I wanna come Home
by GameCubeGirl1
Summary: A purpleclad mercenary yearns to be with his family once more. SPOILERS if you havent gotten to disc 2 or completed the game.


Disclaimer: I do not own tales of symphonia or any of it's characters, places etc, the game belongs to Namco and the characters belong to Kosuke Fujishima.

I also do not own the lyrics of the song used here, which is called Home, sung by Michael Buble, and belongs to whoever wrote the lyrics, which I'm sorry to say I do not know, if anyone could oblige me that'd be great cheers

EDIT: For some reason this story was taken off before because it contained song lyrics O.o, so if anyone can let me know what I'm doing wrong please let me know, because as far as I was aware, using song lyrics was fine as long as they were credited, so if I've missed something out please let me know

OoOoOoOoO

Cold, lifeless, and unwelcome.

These are the only words I can use to describe the atmosphere of this mana-ridden comet known as Derris Kharlan.

I however, had made the choice of coming here to fulfill my duty of becoming leader of the remaining desian half-elves, despite the pleading words of the dual-swordsman who shares my blood.

At the time I was too stubborn to stay with him and become the father I have longed to be after that faithful day fourteen years ago.

Fourteen years… for one such as myself who has lived for over four thousand, the last fourteen have taken forever to pass by.

And now, I am doomed to remain here for all eternity whilst my son lives in the new world we created together.

The thought of eternity frightens me so, and I am not one for being frightened so easily. Even the fact that I am immortal has never frightened me, as it only means my body does not age, for I can still be killed through injury and illness, and for one as cautious as myself, I will easily outlive my son, something I thought would never happen.

I have lost track of just how long it has been since I was sent here… by him. Sent here by the one person who asked me to stay, or rather pleaded with me to stay, through tear-filled eyes...

_The one person I should have listened to..._

OoOoOoOoO

We were standing outside the ruins of The Tower of Salvation. Silent at first, unsure what to say to each other. My enhanced hearing easily picked up Lloyd nervously shuffling his feet and kicking up dirt, as well as his increasing heartbeat. That is until Lloyd finally spoke.

"Dad, please don't go, don't make me sacrifice my own family after all we've been through" He pleaded with me, clearly upset at my choice of path.

I found it hard to keep my own tears in check. Only once in my four thousand years of life did I shed tears, and I truly thought that would be my first and last time, yet here I am, trying so hard to not let my tears fall at the shaking and pleading voice of my son.

"Lloyd… please do not cry." My voice was barely a whisper, as I walked towards him and placed my hands on his shoulders. Even though I had fought my son several times, I could never stand to be the one who caused him pain.

While holding him at arms length, I looked straight into his eyes and told him my reason.

"Lloyd, I have told you why I cannot stay with you, the half-elves will never be accepted here unless I bring all the remaining desian half-elves back with me to Derris Kharlan." He was looking at the ground after the first few words I said, as if only half-listening to me, or rather trying to pretend he did not hear me.

"But, but why?" He shoved my hands from his shoulders rather violently, in order to get his point across, I could only stare in shock at his sudden behaviour.

"Raine and Genis will be going on their own journey to make half-elves more accepted, surely they can do that with or without the remaining desians?"

"For them to remain here would only make things worse." My voice was suddenly cold and flat. I hadn't meant it to be like that but it must have been my own subconscious mind that told me I had to get my point across to him one way or the other. But Lloyd did not deserve that harsh tone, as my son he deserved so much more.

"But…I..I..." Lloyd could only stare at the ground, lost for words. Though he did in fact understand why I had to take them to Derris Kharlan, I could see that it was not the desians that bothered him.

Before I even opened my mouth to ask why he was so against it, he somehow read my mind and lifted his head to answer my silent question.

"But..I love you dad!" My expression changed to one of pure shock. "I want you to stay here with me. You said you liked the idea of coming with me on a journey around the new world to look for remaining exspheres on a boat we would build together, please dad, I…" His voice was barely audible as he finished his sentence. "I beg you dad…please stay."

If I could have run away at anytime it would have been then. I could not bear to even look at him after promising something I should have spent more time thinking about.

I bit the bullet however and slowly wrapped my arms around him, the last embrace I thought I would ever give to him, and he did nothing to stop me.

"I love you too… my son" At this he returned my embrace and cried into my shoulder.

"Then let me go with you." I looked down to find him nuzzled against my shoulder, voice muffled by my tunic, his eyes tightly shut, not wanting to see my response.

Though shocked at his question I admired his courage, he was willing to give up all he had to stay with me on a goddess-forsaken comet. There was no way I would allow him to do that.

"I would never ask you to give up the joyful life you have lived so far, so I want you to continue to live it..." I gave him a smile, my first genuine one for years. "..for both of us."

Lloyd's expression seemed to soften a little from what I could see. I think he knew there was nothing else he could say that would change my mind…no matter how much I wanted him to.

Releasing him from my arms, I told him what he had to do. "It is time for me to go, please use the Eternal sword to send us to Derris Kharlan." I walked away a few steps, ready for the impact I knew I would feel from the sword.

Wiping away his last tear, Lloyd took the sword, and held it up for all to see. "Good bye….dad." Was all I heard, before a brilliant flash of light separated us for the last time.

OoOoOoOoO

Since that day, I have been all alone up here. Even though this place is full of angels, roughly a million of them, I still feel alone.

And so to keep my mind somewhat active, I have been constantly thinking about what would have happened had I stayed with him. I do not even know if he has decided to go on that journey collecting exspheres on his own or with another of our companions.

I never thought I would say this, but the companions I travelled with had become dear friends of mine, I would even dare to say that I had grown quite fond of them. They made me feel welcome, and even forgave me for betraying them at the Tower of Salvation. I didn't want to follow Mithos's orders at all, but it was necessary so I could continue gathering the essential items needed for forging the Eternal ring for Lloyd.

At one point during my search, Lloyd ran into me completely by mistake at Flanoir. He seemed happy to seem me at first but as soon as I looked back at him his expression hardened a little and asked what I was doing there. I simply stated that I was looking at the stars, he didn't seem to believe me but there wasn't much I could do to convince him otherwise, and he went on his way again, leaving me alone with old memories flooding back to me.

"Kratos?"

I almost jumped out of my skin, I should have known better not to sit in the dark alleyway at the side of Welgaia's main building, I hadn't heard anyone come up behind me and I swiftly got up turned around thinking I was about to be attacked.

"My my, you must have been seriously deep in thought if you didn't hear me walk up to you at all, I wasn't even trying to be quiet."

I felt embarrassed now and turned away and lifted a hand to my face to hide the colour in my cheeks for being so foolish.

"Yuan, I apologise, I had almost forgotten you were here as well."

"Forgotten? Kratos I saw you just a few days ago after returning from my search of this comet to find anymore exspheres to discard like you asked."

"Yes...of course, I'm sorry Yuan." Ever since Yuan saved me back at Torent forest, he has become a dear friend of mine, perhaps the only person on this desolate wasteland I can trust.

"You know Kratos, you've been acting strange lately." Replied Yuan, while walking up to and standing right in front of me. Though his arms for once were not folded over his chest, but hung at his side and his normally harsh features changed to what I can only describe as a sympathetic look.

"This wouldn't have anything to do with the fact that Derris-Kharlan is coming closer to the atmosphere of Symphonia for the first time in a year is it?"

"A year?" I gaped at him in shock, I couldn't believe it. It had felt so much longer since I'd last seen hi….since…I'd come here.

Yuan smirked then reached over and lifted my chin with his finger to close my mouth after I had left it open in shock.

I rubbed my chin as he continued talking, he'd closed it a little harder than I would have liked.

"Yes a year. And I think I know what has been bothering you since you found out."

Since coming here, not once did I breath a word about my feelings of wanting to go back home... wait, home? Did I really consider being back with my son as home? Either way, I must have been acting like an open book to Yuan if he could read me so well without me saying a word to him.

"Judging by your silence I can tell that you were unaware that I knew exactly what's been going through your head this whole time." Now Yuan decides to fold his arms, obviously knowing that he's gotten the better of me so far.

"Yuan," I replied, while looking down and away from him, my voice starting to fill with pain, "Please do not even start talking about it, there is no point. I came here to do my duty and that's all, now please excuse me whilst I return to my office."

I turned away and started walking into the building, when I heard him again.

"To do what Kratos? Stare into space for hours on end like you've always been doing since you got here?"

I kept my back to him as I replied. "If you have any more of your amazingly interesting paper work for me to go through then by all means drop it off next time you come by." It was rare for me to be sarcastic, and I simply felt like doing it just then as I started my second attempt at walking off.

"Kratos, you're getting me all wrong." Yuan replied, with a slight chuckle in his voice. My sorrow was temporarily forgotten as I turned to him in utter confusion.

He simply smirked and lowered his arms, "I am relieving you of all your duties."

OoOoOoOoO

Authoress' (normal) PoV

A weathered old building made of mostly logs, nestled in the mountains on the outskirts of the Iselia forest, served as the home of Dirk and his adopted son Lloyd Aurion Irving.

Currently, Lloyd was just finishing chopping logs for his dad's carving projects. He set the axe beside the massive tree stump just outside his house and wiped his brow.

"Man I'm beat! I really gotta work out more instead of goofing off with Genis to play 'who can hit the mayor with mudballs today'."

"Bark" A familiar green and white arshis ran up to Lloyd, seemingly in state of excitement.

"Huh? Oh hey Noishe! What's up?" Lloyd was about to pet his beloved friend when Noishe started tugging on his belt then lifting his head upwards, obviously indicating something.

After a few more rounds of 'tug & point' Lloyd finally looked up, and something clicked into place. "Hey it's a really clear night! I know what you want now Noishe, it's been a while huh? Been too cloudy recently for us to do some proper stargazing, go to your pen and I'll fetch a blanket.

"Bark bark!" Noishe ran off to his pen as instructed, while Lloyd ran into the house and up to his room, practically whizzing by Dirk who seemed completely unfazed by his son's mad dash as he worked delicately on a small wooden carving, something that seemed to be in the shape of a woman.

Within seconds Lloyd ran by again and stomped outside, eager to begin a favourite hobby of his as he went to Noishe's pen, and practically curled up beside him with his large blue blanket draping over them both. He laid back onto Noishe's side, arms behind his head, and Noishe curled round and lay his head on Lloyd's chest, who in return began absentmindly, yet at the same time fondly scritching Noishe's head, knowing well that he'd enjoy it since it was the one place his legs couldn't reach to scratch for himself.

Lloyd let out a long sigh of complete relaxation and comfort as he lay with his old friend, and looked up to the sky and began studying it, trying hard to remember his constellations.

"Ok, lets see..." A red gloved finger lazily reached out to the sky, acting as the pencil in the 'dot to dot' puzzle of stars above them.

His finger made out a small square-like shape out of the stars, and followed it to a large tail that came out from it's left side.

"Aha! That's the big dipper! Otherwise known as Ursa Major."

"Howl" Replied Noishe, seemingly letting Lloyd know if he was correct or not.

"Heh, I always seem to find that one first, if I remember correctly I first recognised it when I was very young. I was sitting on a rooftop, trying to see if I could make out the shapes on my own, but I could never find them. But one night I was so hungry while I sat there, that I just looked up and immediately spotted something that looked like a giant cooking pot with a really long handle. It took me a while to realise that I had just spotted my first constellation!

Noishe seemed to chuckle at that, knowing that food always seemed to bring out the best in Lloyd. As Lloyd lifted his hand to the stars again, Noishe followed, trying to make out what he found next.

"Ok that's a much smaller square-like thingy, the tail of it reaches down to the South-East.." Lloyd continued to follow a rather large row of stars, puzzled at what it could be.

"And this part goes West and seems to curl round, almost like the shape of a wi..." He paused, shocked that he actually does remember this group of stars, so much so you could probably see the light-bulb above his head.

"That was an old favourite of mine, the Draco! A mythical beast from the Ancient Kharlan War!"

Noishe bared his teeth a little, a smile on his behalf, and howled a happy howl at Lloyd's correct recognition. Thinking he was on a hot-streak, he continued.

"Hey look at that those!" He pointed to a straight row of three really bright stars, Noishe followed his gaze.

"Isn't that Aurion...uh I mean Orion's Belt?" Realising his mistake, his gaze dropped and he looked saddened.

Noishe understood why, and nuzzled his nose into the crook of Lloyds neck, causing him to giggle a little at the cold and wet nose that moved around his neck.

Lloyd brought both his arms around Noishe's neck, and buried his face into his fur, whispering to the only person who understood him. "I'm sorry Noishe, I didn't mean to upset you."

Noishe only continued to try and cheer Lloyd up, and began licking his face, causing him to laugh and wipe away his tears.

Noishe indicated to the sky again, and Lloyd looked up and continued gazing once again, his sadness forgotten. His eyes fell onto something that twinkled slightly, something round, a little bigger than the moon, and seemed to be a faded purple colour, it was hard to see at first, which was of course why he hadn't noticed it before. He simply blinked in confusion and whispered to no one inparticular.

"What's that?"

OoOoOoOoO

Kratos' POV from here on out.

"You're what?" I could not believe what my old friend was telling me, why would he relieve me of my duties? Was he firing me? Not that I got payed for it, but it was my duty none the less.

"You heard me Kratos. You are free from all your duties, free to do as you please." Yuan turned his back to me as he finished his sentence, his way of telling me he was done talking.

But I was not.

"Are you firing me?" I was getting seriously mad now, as I did not understand this at all. "Is this your way of getting back at me or something? Yuan I've told you time and time again that Martel's death was not.."

At this point he quickly turned back and placed a hand on my shoulder, letting out a small laugh that simply confused me more.

"Kratos that's not it at all, stop flying off the handle and let me explain."

The gleam in his eyes told me he was enjoying my reaction. I forced myself to calm down and listen to him as he removed his hand and placed it on his chest and folded it with the other.

"Kratos, I am giving you the chance to do what I missed out on."

"And what would that be?"

"Raising a son."

"Yuan what are..."

"I'm giving you the chance to go back to where you belong Kratos, with your son. You see, Martel and I always wanted a family, but fate was not on our side, and I never got that chance. You however did, and I want you to do what I could not. And I know you want this Kratos, you've wanted this from the moment you found out that your son had been alive all these years. I can see it in your eyes, it's been practically shining like a beacon ever since you came here."

"I... did not realise I was so easy to read." I looked away and down at the ground, ashamed I had let my emotions show so much.

"You do want this don't you?"

I contemplated a moment before answering, trying hard to put the mask back on my face.

"It matters not what I want, what matters is that I came here to fulfill my duty, I realised that from the moment I set foot here, I knew what had to be done."

"And what's done is done Kratos. The desians have settled quite well here, and soon will not need us to lead them. Surely you don't want to stay here for eternity do you?"

"Well, no" I mentally kicked myself, for surely Yuan would have picked up on my hesitation.

"I thought not. But as of now I can lead them myself until the next time Derris Kharlan comes close to Symphonia. As for you, I want you go to home, and live a normal life once again with your family.

I glared at Yuan fiercly, hand on the hilt of my blade by pure instinct. "How can a Seraphim live a normal life? I'll surely outlive my son, something I never wanted to happen!"

Yuan seemed unfazed at my anger, perhaps knowing something that I did not.

"I'll tell you how you can do that Kratos."

My expression softened into confusion for the tenth time as he told me something I hadn't thought about for years.

"There is one last exsphere, or rather cruxis crystal remaining on this planet." He gestured at my left hand, I raised it, then became painfully aware of what he was trying to say.

"When you first acquired that exsphere it did the same for you as it did your son; enhanced your power, skills and reflexes. But when you became a Seraphim, it evolved into a cruxis crystal and haulted your aging process as did mine. And gave you angellic powers, heightened hearing, smell and sight, and dulled everything else. And so by removing it and placing it with the rest already scattered, you will begin to age once more, however your wings will remain as did Colette's, and all your senses will return to that of normal human level."

There was no hiding from him now, it was an offer I could not refuse, letting down my mask I replied.

"I.. I do not know what to say Yuan. Are you sure it's ok? What about you? You're not going to remain here are you?" I could not let Yuan stay here forever instead of me, especially after what he had just offered, so I simply wanted to be sure that he would be alright without me.

"I told you already, the next time Derris Kharlan passes by Symphonia I will descend there after removing my own cruxis crystal and begin a new life. I've mourned over Martel long enough, and I know she would not want me like this forever."

I took a few moments to process this information. Yuan stood by patiently, waiting for my answer.

I contemplated my pro's and cons. What if things didn't work out with Lloyd? What if he didn't want me around at all? I shook my head of these thoughts and turned back to Yuan.

"I cannot, I am needed here, end of discussion." I turned and began to walk away again, when I felt a hand grab my shoulder and forced me to turn round.

"Kratos! Screw your duty! You no longer have a job here!" He placed his remaining hand on my other shoulder, and spoke to me with a softer yet sincere tone.

"Kratos, never mind what I or the desians want. I'm asking you what _you_ want. What do _you_ want to do Kratos?"

I gave up and looked down, thankful that my unruly hair was hiding my eyes, for a familiar stinging sensation began, and I was straining to speak

"I... want to go home, and be with my son."

OoOoOoOoO

_Another summer day  
Has come and gone away  
In Paris and Rome  
But I wanna go home _

I was led to the warp pad outside Yggdrasil's old abandoned castle.

Surprisingly, Yuan stepped closer to me and pulled me into an embrace.

Forgetting his superiority for now I hugged him back, who knows when I would see him again?

"Goodbye my friend, live a happy life with your son." He stepped away and held his hand out expectantly.

Hesitating a little, I handed him my cruxis crystal, and felt my power drain slightly as I did so, but I know I would get used to it soon enough.

__

May be surrounded by  
A million people I  
Still feel all alone  
I just wanna go home  
Oh I miss you, you know

With a last goodbye to my old friend, I stepped into the warp pad, and was taken away from the desolate comet for the last time by a blinding flash of light.

__

And I've been keeping all the letters that I wrote to you  
Each one a line or two  
"I'm fine baby, how are you?"  
Well I would send them but I know that it's just not enough  
My words were cold and flat  
And you deserve more than that

Now outside the ruins of the Tower of Salvation, my wings, though a curse at first were now a blessing as they carried me straight North-West towards the Iselian mountains.

__

Another aeroplane  
Another sunny place  
I'm lucky I know  
But I wanna go home  
I've got to go home

Adrenalin began to flow through me as the thought of seeing him again filled me with joy. All these feelings were welcomed with open arms after years of hardly experiencing anything of the sort.

__

Let me go home  
I'm just too far from where you are  
I wanna come home

Soon enough, the familiar mountains peaked over the horizon, all they did was encourage me to fly faster. All these new sensations were indeed strange, but made me feel like someone new. Leaving me wondering why I ever did what I did in the first place.

__

And I feel just like I'm living someone else's life  
It's like I just stepped outside  
When everything was going right  
And I know just why you could not  
Come along with me  
But this was not your dream  
But you always believed in me

There it is! The lone wooden house just on the outskirts of the forest, my heart was beating so fast I swear it would burst. I lost my balance a little and landed in a tree, luckily with no damage to my wings. Shrugging it off I gently climbed down, and began walking towards the house.

__

Another winter day has come  
And gone away  
And even Paris and Rome  
And I wanna go home  
Let me go home

"Please tell me that's Noishe I hear snoring." I whispered to myself, as I came across my old pet's wooden pen, I was still hidden amongst the shrubbery so I had not been spotted, however as I looked around, my breath was taken away.

There he was, curled up with Noishe snoring away like he did when we stayed at several Inn's during the journey, something around his neck glinted in the moonlight. They looked rather adorable the way they were huddled together. I began to wonder whether I should bother waking him or not.

__

And I'm surrounded by  
A million people I  
Still feel alone  
Oh, let go home  
Oh, I miss you, you know

Not having much time to think, Noishe did that for me, and howled and barked until he got Lloyds attention. I was beginning to feel very nervous, wondering what his reaction to me would be, would he reject me?

"Mm..huh? What is it Noishe?" He groggily looked around his surroundings, spotting no danger, then his eyes fell upon me.

_  
Let me go home  
I've had my run  
Baby, I'm done  
I gotta go home  
Let me go home_

"Dad?" He shot straight up from where he was lying, now fully awake, and startling Noishe. I could see him starting to shake slightly, and his voice was quivering, possibly hyperventilating.

_  
It'll all be alright_

"Lloyd?"

"Dad! Is it really you?"

When I saw his face light up with pure happiness at confirming that it was indeed me, I nodded, and smiled wider than before, I practically beamed.

"I'm here to stay son, if you will let me." I felt tears of my own well up, but I no longer cared for them

_  
I'll be home tonight_

My answer was a blur of red that crashed into me and caused me to fall hard on my.. rather soft rear-end, a pair of arms wrapped around my neck, and a head buried into my chest.

"Dad I can't believe you're here! Of course you can stay! Just don't ever leave me again!" He continued to shed tears of joy, and I wrapped my arms around him in return, and continued to shed my own.

We cried together like that for a while, with Noishe howling with joy as well as licking my face whenever he got the chance, and from that moment on, I knew,

That we would never be separated again.

_I'm coming back home_


End file.
